Gratitude and Boondoggles

Every few weeks I catch up on listening to the devotional talks from Brigham Young University-Idaho, my alma mater. Today I am listening to this wonderful talk. The following portion made me swell with tears for the love and sacrifice of both my mother and my Father in Heaven. And I remember the good old day of boondoggles. I hope you like it too.

Do you remember sitting at an arts and crafts table somewhere, sometime in your life, braiding some long strips of plastic into what some people call a boondoggle or a lanyard? One of my favorite American poets writes of one he made as a 9-year-old boy and gave to his mother:

I had never seen anyone use a lanyard

or wear one, if that’s what you did with them,
but that did not keep me from crossing
strand over strand again and again
until I had made a boxy
red and white lanyard for my mother.

She gave me life and [nourishment from her own body],
and I gave her a lanyard.
She nursed me in many a sick room,
lifted spoons of medicine to my lips,
laid cold face-cloths on my forehead,
and then led me out into the airy light

and taught me to walk and swim,
and I, in turn, presented her with a lanyard.
Here are thousands of meals, she said,
and here is clothing and a good education.
And here is your lanyard, I replied,
which I made with a little help from a counselor.

Here is a breathing body and a beating heart,
strong legs, bones and teeth,
and two clear eyes to read the world, she whispered,
and here, I said, is the lanyard I made at camp.
And here, I wish to say to her now,
is a smaller gift—not the worn truth

that you can never repay your mother,
but the rueful admission that when she took
the two-tone lanyard from my hand,
I was as sure as a boy could be
that this useless, worthless thing I wove
out of boredom would be enough to make us even.¹⁶

These words hit a little close to home for me.

The realization of the magnitude of my debt to my mother came to me in phases: haltingly as a teenager; in great heart-wrenching waves as a missionary and then later as a young parent. Even now, as a middle-aged fat man, it settles on me from time to time and makes me weepy.

But, as the poet says, confronting my debt to my mother is not the most disturbing part of this. Rather, it’s the realization that I have actually felt (at least sometimes) that my pitiful expressions of gratitude to her were enough to make us even.

And even more disturbing, I find that I sometimes think the same way about what I owe to God. I go on as if my sporadic temple attendance and my pretty-good personal prayers and my hit-and-miss family nights are enough to make us even; that these “lanyards” I offer to God are a sufficient trade for Eternal Life and Glory and “all that [the] Father hath.”

It makes me wonder, "what lack I yet?"

Party at Grandpa's

Stuart's new grandma ("mimama") brought this fun jungle gym from ID just for Stuart! :) We visited grandpa and mimama this weekend, and Stuart enjoyed the ride.

Happy Birthday, Jenn!

I have been so busy with traveling, visiting family, house hunting, and our dying computer that I have not posted about anything. Sorry. Not to mention, all my pictures of the BIRTHDAY GIRL are lost in the abyss of the computer. Sorry, but this is all I could get my hands on. Although, she is stunning, isn't she?

This week, my tribute is to my favorite Jennifer! This sister-in-law is more like a sister than an in-law. Jenn first joined our family almost 12 years ago, but has watched me grow up since years before the wedding. She has contributed to my development and learning just as much as my sisters have during these last couple decades. I love you, Jenn!

I admire so many of her strengths. When I think of Jenn I think of boldness, health, thrift, honesty, and faith. I can count on Jenn to tell me the truth, tell me clearly, and know that she speaks out of love. Some of the most difficult truths have come from Jenn and yet from them came the greatest growth and self-awareness. I can call on Jenn for health suggestions and the latest deals. She loves and listens to her body and has helped me do the same with mine. She knows where to find a sweet bargain and has saved our family hundreds of dollars with her resourcefulness and generosity. She is what author Malcolm Gladwell calls a maven: an information specialist and one who gathers information, especially about the marketplace. A maven might also be "pathologically helpful." Jenn can't help herself when it comes to helping others find a good deal. My wallet and my husband are very grateful for this strength of hers too.

Finally, I thoroughly admire Jenn's faith. She doesn't give in to the pressure and norms of a worldly environment just to neglect her values. I know from timeless encounters that Jenn will give up the ghost before she will doubt in her Lord's power or give up on His promises. I expect to see her physically move a mountain one day. Her faith is that great.

Thank you, Jenn. Just keep being you. It makes my brother happy and I adore all your children. I love you. Happy birthday!!

Bucket head

Stuart chose this as his favorite "hat" weeks ago. He wears it almost every day while playing and following mommy and daddy around. It's getting him ready for when I make him wear a helmet for the rest of his schooling years. . . . Just kidding. :)

What a day!

Today has been so fun. My dear friend, Adrienne, is visiting with her 2 kids and so we met downtown at this WONDERLAND for children. I wish I had played at a place like this when I was little. With four kids and three adults, it was very tiring and fun. This "Playseum" is like a mini town with lots of rooms made up to be like shops for kids. Each room has lots of books that match the theme. The rooms were themes like grocery store, farm, grandma's house, pet shop, crafts store, pizza shop, the bakery, a musicians stage, sports, Africa, and many others. It was amazing!

The pet shop has real animals to see.

How could we NOT have fun in such company? Radiating happiness.

And before I even left the house this morning, I added family pictures to Stuart's shape puzzle, like this:

Before

After: with several (but not all) family members added for him to find under the shapes. Oh, and yes. Jesus is part of our family. :) Stuart really enjoyed it, as you can see in this video. He's saying "HI" but then it sounds like he says "Hi, Jesus."

It has been a great day, and it isn't even over. Dinner is bound to be good too. The dough is rising for the spinach and feta calzones. Mmmm.

Vision Board, Chick-fil-a, & Stu

You know your life is riveting when you take the time to blog about a stop at Chick-fil-a.....

But first! This week Jared and I created VISION BOARDS. We watched a movie recently that my little sis recommended: The Secret. Interesting movie, for another day. But, one thing that stuck with me from this secretive documentary, was the creation of a vision board to visualize and ultimately realize your goals. Using our 2012 goals, we created a visual manifestation of our priorities this year. Here it is! Mine is on the right, Jared's on the left:

Today, while walking around the mall with my AWESOME friends, Stuart and I met the cow from Chick-fil-a. Poor guy was scared. He definitely likes real animals over costumed ones.

And finally, just a little glimpse into my joy of my day: Stuart.

He likes chatting with himself in this ridiculously over-sized mirror.

And he almost fits into Daddy's slippers. Almost.

Thanks for looking. :)

Happy Birthday, Amy Jo!

As I started this post, I realized I don't have any of my own digital pictures of Amy! What?! It has been a while since we've been together. Living across the country will do that.

So I started looking at my old pictures to scan and WOW! What treasures I found! First of all, blast from the past. Second, we were such dorks and I was much skinnier. Amy, however, is timeless. She hasn't aged at all. In fact, she got skinnier over the years. You go girl! And I forgot how many joyful memories I have with this amazing, talented woman. She and I were just giggle buddies back in the day, but she has grown up to be a very talented photographer and entrepreneur. (<--check out her work!) Not to mention, a world traveler! So incredible!

This first beauty from 2000 is me, Amy, and Jenna Molyneux (who is also below). I think this was just after Jenna and I had performed in a stake original musical called "With Sincere Heart".

This is at Amy Jo's house, where I jumped for hours on her trampoline. They don't call it the splits for nothing, because I eventually SPLIT my pants open!

Evidence of our dorkdom. Just before a school dance, we were practicing our moves at her house....

Eating out with Camila while Amy visited my mother-land: Maryland. And her loves of traveling begins. . .

Another school dance. We didn't have men, so we went together. Who needs a date when you've got her? SO much fun!

Some adventure while in MD

And of course, Girl's Camp. Can you find us? I'm the one perched on her back! She's the grand kind of friend who is willing to carry her loved ones' burdens. Even if that means literally carrying them on her back. :) Thumbs up!

I really treasure Amy Jo. Thank you, Amy, for sticking by me during the most difficult years of my life. For giving me joy and laughter and love. Thank you for expecting goodness from me and accepting me in spite of me. Thank you for making me feel welcome as I've reached out through the years. Thank you for sharing your home and extra bed with me, Jared and Stuart. Thank you for inspiring me to create. Thank you for taking me around the world in your pictures. And thank you for being born. I am SO glad that happened. Happy birthday, dear-y. I love you!